Thursday, June 18, 2009

Live blogging: at a funeral

I'm at a funeral right now. Its funny, the priest was just eating breakfast when we got here, and it was like 10 in the morning. Just seems like when you're a priest you should be halfway through your day by then. Also, the mass started when the church bells chimed for 11, but in looking at my clock, the church bells are 10 minutes slow. Strange.

Since we got here about an hour before Mass started I sat down on a bench in the church garden, and was soon joined by a boy (well, he looked about 18, but I didn't ask) who said hello and took the seat next to me (uh, I guess he didn't notice the other two empty benches right there) and started chatting me up. Normally I bring a book with me to a funeral, and just read it during the 'down time' but I finished my book last night and didn't stick another one in my bag. So, he is asking me all about working at the funeral home and what I do there ("are you the one that takes out the guts?" to which I say that he is confusing an embalmer (me) with a coroner (definitely not me), and that I do not remove any guts, just blood and other body fluids), and he's really into it, but not in the morbid-facination way, but in the I-bet-I-could-do-that kind of way. So, he tells me he works at the local high school and runs a soccer training school as well, and lucky for me we started talking about him instead. After a bit more soccer chatting my co-worker walks over and the boy asks if that's my boss, and I tell him that in fact I am his boss, and he doesn't believe me since I'm not only female, but also about 35 years younger than my co-worker. So the kid asks my co-worker, who confirms that I am indeed his boss, so the boy asks me for a job. Lol, right?


Anonymous said...

Please tell me this kid was a young Rain Wilson... and that you hired him. And yes, a priest should be just finishing up lunch around 10am.

Also: I comment entirely way too much on your blog, and I'm becoming one of "those commenters" who has to say something about every post. So I'll try to stop all that.

David C. Garcia said...

If I had to recreate this for a short film, the kid asking you all of the questions would bee the kid in A Christmas Story who says, "I like Santa....I like The Wizard of Oz."

Homeslice said...

i'm sorry, i got distracted by "and other bodily fluids" and promptly went to my happy place.


Doll Face said...

1. Who is Rain Wilson

2. I've never seen A Christmas Story

3. Sorry about the body fluids, they just leak out, LOL!!!

Anonymous said...

1. Rainn Wilson: the guy who plays Dwight on The Office, also played Arthur Martin on Six Feet Under... an HBO show about an effed-up family who owned a funeral home (please tell me you've seen it. If not, go rent the DVDs because I half the reason why I love your blog is because I loved this show).

2. What? I... I... How have you NEVER seen A Christmas Story? You'll shoot your eye out? Wow. Rent that one, too.

3. Keep that gross stuff comin'.

thecheckoutgirl said...

it warms my heart to see my friends harassing you.

the reason *I* love your blog (though nobody asked) is that yours was my intended profession, as well. when San Francisco College of Mortuary Science closed down, my heart broke and I wandered away.

thanks for sharing and for warmly accepting my peeps.

Doll Face said...

1. I know that guy! And yes, I have seen Six Feet Under, and love that show.

2. My huspand gives me crap all the time about these "classics" that I've never seen, but I still have no interest in seeing them, I'd rather read.

3. You betcha!

TCG- I hear that was a good school for MortSci. Let me know if you ever decide to switch careers, there's a good one down south too, and I've got connections to get you an awesome apartment above a funeral home...

Ivan Toblog said...

A Christmas Story is one of the best things Jean Shepherd ever wrote. He was definitely an outstanding story teller