Thursday, June 4, 2009

Things I'm tired of people asking

1. Oh, (hee hee) you see dead people??

2. Does your hair really keep growing after you die?

3. People move, like, they sit up, after they die, right? Isn't that scary?

4. Aren't you freaked out?

5. What do you do with all the guts?

Argh! Just use your BRAINS!!!! Sheesh.


mattonfire said...

These are legitimate questions! You should just answer them here for all to see. Your profession can only be done by a small percentage of the population. Most people view death as freaky and gross. We're all curious about what we don't understand or are afraid of. But really, do people sit up after they die? Because that's just weird.

Doll Face said...

So, you're lucky that I only am annoyed at those questions when either: 1. it's an old guy asking me the first one so that he can see me smile, or 2. I'm already in a bad mood. And, since neither of those apply here (right??), I will answer them:
1. Funny, that's a reference to that one movie, right?? *flirty laugh* What was the name...Sixth Sense? You're funny!! *flirty laugh #2*
2. Um, no. When one dies they are dead. Nothing grows.
3. This one, I can't figure out. I mean, my theory is that back in the 1950s or so a group of typical-old-man morticians got together and decided that they didn't seem fierce enough in the general public, so they made up a story about bodies that would randomly move, sit up or whatever, and started spreading it around. I mean, logically it makes no sense, but it's the question I get the most. I suppose it could come from the death rattle that some people have after they die, but sitting up after death and having a bit of trapped air that gets released from the lungs are definitely very different, so that explanation would have had some serious exaggeration along with it.
4. No, no I am definitely not freaked out. It's just not a freaky job. I imagine a freaky job would be like cleaning the thirteenth wing of the Winchester Mystery House, or something, not working with the dead. I mean, they're dead... What are they possibly going to do to me?
5. I don't do anything with the guts. I don't remove anything but blood. The guts just sit there, just like they do when you're alive, they just don't move any more.

So, Sweet Pea, there you have 'em.

Jared said...

I can see how these questions can be frustrating. Any question that relates to your job/what you do day in and day out that seem like obvious or dumb questions can be very tedious to deal with.

For example, while not quite the same thing, since I am an English major I get asked all the time, when someone finds out I am said major, "Oh, so you want to teach, right?", like that's all you can use an English degree for. Since I have researched all the common and uncommon things one could do with your life as an English major, it seems like a very close-minded or shallow question, just because it's the first thing that pops into someone's mind when you say English. Then again, some people are just dummies.

Love the blog so far, looking forward to reading more.


Doll Face said...

LoL. Thanks, Jared!